Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Signs of the slow meltdown into crazy


I developed a disturbing habit tonight. I began to talk to the tv. Only to the good shows, like NCIS and House, and it's not like they talk back. Either way, I found myself saying things like "House you. Are. SO. Mean!" and "Ha! Way to go Sean from Felicity slash Alias, he so deserved that knee to the balls!" While this might have been behavior exhibited previously (watch how I cleverly turn this into a "woe is me" pity party), it was always with others in the room where it could be adroitly hidden under the guise that I was talking to the real people. Now... not so much.

I registered for a ceramics class in the local arts school (or so they call themselves). I expect to be very proud of some truly horrible vases. If you are very lucky, perhaps you will receive one for your birthday, or Christmas. You will, of course, be obligated to profess your love for it no matter what the glaze - even purple polka dots, boys.

There is inexplicably the smell of licorice in my kitchen. I hate licorice. And anise. And fennel, and caraway, and anything else that reminds me of licorice. It is a disgusting flavor and a disturbing smell and I abhor it. I will not buy it and I will not tolerate it in my presence (if I can help it). But Somehow, Someway, it has ferreted its evil way into my Kitchen and I cannot figure out how, but it is war.

And, no. This post has nothing to do with goats. In case you didn't notice.

10 comments:

Troy said...

Can I say that I am quite dissappointed that even "Denny Crane" of Boston Legal won't talk back to me on my TV? Well, if I can't, too bad, because I already did. Boston Legal is one of the shows, in my personal opinion, is one of those shows that I would pay money to be able to help write for. I cannot get enough of that show! Sorry, I deviated from the Goat... uhhh... hmmm... what was I saying??? Oh yeah, vases are cool! ;c)

Troy said...

My great writing abilities and grammar use in the previous post were brought to you by Pepsi-Cola. I have a sponsor for my poor writing... Sorry, I meant to preview it, but I am at work, so I was trying to be quick about it.

Did I mention how much you are missed here in Sunny, Grand Rapids?

Anonymous said...

I watched the end of "Philidephia Story" last night. Cary Grant, Jimmy Stewart and Katherine Hepburn...you can't get much better than that. It is amazing to listen to the dialog...it is so quick. Much quicker and more intelligent than most of the TV and movies now. Have you ever seen Harvey with Jimmy Stewart?.....Since you seem to be wallowing, ya ought to pick up.

I will love any vase you make me!

Mom

Jackie Parker said...

Mom,

Yes I've seen Harvey. It was funny. I'm not wallowing. In fact, IMHO, that was the most cheerful I've been in some time. So there. :P Ok, so maybe it sounded depressed. But it wasn't. Really. I promise.

Anonymous said...

it never ceases to amaze me that even in a blog, you drift off an a number of subjects. I do admit that when I'm watching Law and Order, besides the occasional laugh, I tend to talk to the TV too.

Jackie Parker said...

Even with purple polka dots, Troy? Jamie & Troy, I don't always have the utmost confidence either of your sanity, but I do still love you. No offense. I guess we'll all just go mad togther. Only separately. ;)

Anonymous said...

COMMENT

Troy said...

I prefer the purple polka dot vase, as it will go well with my underwear! Sorry, just had to prove that I already lost it, or well, that I am trying!

benning said...

NCIS and House! Nice! I watch 'em, too! Gave up on Law & Order a while back.

Who doesn't talk to their TV? Take it from this 50-year-old, giving the TV hell is a normal thing!

Nice goat.

Anonymous said...

Oh dear god. If I thought I was going crazy every time I talked to something inanimate, I'd have been in the looney bin ages ago. I'll talk to lettuce. It's a head. It must have ears. Corn, also. Good listeners.